Taking the good with the bad….

I am going to start off with the good. I passed my group fitness instructor and personal trainer exam with a 93%. I am super excited at the prospect of being a personal trainer. I imagine myself helping someone discover their inner strength and self-confidence. Yes all rainbows and unicorns……

The bad….Well I need to give a little history. My sons dad, D, is an alcoholic. He is looking a being sent to prison as of next Tuesday. He is not a criminal but truly an alcoholic. He has never missed a child support payment, he has always provided excellent health insurance and seen our son regularly for his first 9 years here on Earth……but he is an alcoholic….binge/blackout drinker…He has received his 5th DUI and while being fingered printed he hit the officer and cut his face open….the prosecutor is willing to drop the DUI (WHAT???) but want to hang him on the battery of a police officer, which is a Felony and send him to prison for 2 years. I am torn as I do not see this as a way to change him or help him. I would rather see him court ordered to a rehab for a year and see our tax money spent helping him not keeping him in a jail cell and not changing…So not only is my son loosing his dad but his child support (Approximately $7,200.00 a year) and his excellent health insurance….but we will be fine. My husband has been in our lives since my son was 15 months and like I said before he is now 9.

Bad news number two….Well it’s my mom. She has battled substance abuse (But it’s prescribed, it’s her medicine!! Some doctors, which she is good at finding, are just legal drug dealers), alcoholism, low self-esteem and a very unhealthy co-dependent relationship with my older, half-sister….Yesterday morning I received a phone call from the local police that my mom was in a bad way. Now I have seen my mom slobbering, head bobbing, thick tongue, crawling across the floor, cussing me on how she deserves this….WHAT?? But yesterday she was scared, wide awake, no slobbering…..I went to the ER thinking she had taken something but her blood work came back negative. She said something that she hadn’t had her anti-depressant in a couple weeks and had been up 5 days with no food. It was heartbreaking. The hospital was great and she is now in a local psych ward. I have been here before, they will keep her up to 2 weeks then send her home. You can’t fix that in 2 weeks….that’s just a vacation for her to get her rest, food, and medications changed up…..The system is broke. I wish I could take all the 2 weeks she has been in over the years and put them together and keep her there and get her the help she needs…..

So my sons dad went on a huge bender over the weekend and my mom went to the psych ward….but I will not drink….Lets remember all who are still struggling, for they are many….Love, Peace and Sobriety!

PS this is a lot of rambling and I know I just put a lot of information out there but I feel better writing it out.

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